A Bailey Legacy

Tis rather delicious

Archive for the tag “winter”

Chapter 8.8

Chapter 8.8 Nice day for a white wedding

Maple and Cory decided to throw a winter wedding in their backyard, just to be different.  Being insanely rich, they were able to afford ice sculpted chairs and a cute DJ called Tom.Screenshot-11572To Maple’s annoyance, the paparazzi also made an appearance since she was a Z list celebrity in the media world.  Fortunately, she had a way to deal with such inconveniences.

‘Hmm, that’s funny,’ Maple spoke out loud, ‘I don’t remembering hiring a chubby and persistently annoying photographer for the wedding.’Screenshot-11564‘Bitch’Screenshot-11560Soon, the official photographer turned up, just in the nick of time for the happy couple to exchange vows and what not.Screenshot-11598As it turned out, Maple was not very photogenic.Screenshot-11595Yet Cory was.Screenshot-11599For this reason, Maple favoured the long distant shots, and the ones where she was not gawping like a demented pitbull.Screenshot-11600During the ceremony, Pistachio was, perhaps, a little bit too emotional.Screenshot-11593No one, apart from his wife (Nicole), found it endearing.Screenshot-11615‘Now we’re married, I guess this means you’re gonna start nagging me more often now,’ Cory joked.

Maple stared him down into a deathly silence.Screenshot-11580He then quickly kissed her before she could ask for a divorce.Screenshot-11606Screenshot-11614‘Cake time!’ Maple enthused, and quite rightly so.Screenshot-11621-editScreenshot-11622-editMaple was quite happily about to dig into her scrumptious slice of wedding cake, until Devon Hoff made his way over to her table, balancing his own equally slice of awesomeness on his old arthritic hand.Screenshot-11629-editMaple did her best to ignore him as he stood there, but he soon enough spoke up.Screenshot-11628-edit‘Room for one more?’ He asked, eyes hopeful.Screenshot-11626-editScreenshot-11627-edit‘Give it time, she’ll come running back to me,’ Devon confidently said, five minutes later, sat at a completely different table.Screenshot-11631-edit‘Sorry, old man,’ Almond asked, her mouth filled with delicious moist cake, ‘did you say something?’Screenshot-11630-editMeanwhile, since the DJ had decided to up and leave before the party was even over, the ever musically talented Rolo had taken over.Screenshot-11633-edit‘I’m making musics!’Screenshot-11635-editNow, it was a common misconception that aliens unitentionally invented dub-step when they first attempted to make contact with humans.  Naturally this was not the case, and as soon discovered, this type of “music” played at exceedingly high volumes was very damaging to an alien’s eardrums, and thus resulted in Orion passing out and almost freezing to death in the snow.Screenshot-11642-editFortunately, Tremayne had come outside to show off his new lover: the hairdryer.Screenshot-11643-edit‘Suppose I’d better do the just thing…’ Tremayne sighed, and proceeded to thaw Orion with Brenda the hairdryer.Screenshot-11644-editMinutes later, Orion had been defrosted.  Tremayne cheered for joy, well, until Orion snatched the hairdryer out from his hand, tossed it into the pool and swore at Tremayne for burning his perfect alien complexion, before marching off.Screenshot-11647-edit‘Why do I even bother?’ Tremayne sighed, then decided to head on inside for a piping hot shower.Screenshot-11648-editThat night, several guests decided to stay over, and by stay over, I mean they basically decided to stand on the front porch and wet themselves because they had temporarily lost the ability to navigate themselves down a straight path and leave the property through an open gate. Pistachio was one of these people, which was why he was a bit stinky the following morning.

After breakfast, he approached Rolo, who was about to practice his mad skills on the DJ booth.Screenshot-11650‘Soon the time will come for Maple to pass the legacy down to someone, and personally, I think you’re best suited,’ Pistachio confessed.  In all honesty, he did not entirely feel this way and just fancied witnessing a bit of drama between his nephews.

‘Couldn’t agree with you anymore, Unc,’ Rolo replied, finally glad that someone had recognised his great potential.  ‘Basil may be a smart guy, but he does have a tendency to steal things at times; not particularly a positive role model for the next generation, right?’Screenshot-11649They continued to bitch about Basil until Rolo eventually noticed that his younger brother had in fact been standing right by them for the entirety of their private conversation, which made things a little bit awkward.Screenshot-11651Naturally, this gave Basil the incentive to prove he could be a just a worthy heir as Rolo could be.  He already had some pretty good traits, minus his kleptomania, so all he needed was a baby vessel, and he had just the girl in mind.  Tia Aquino was a generic pretty young lady who was in a few of his classes at school.Screenshot-11652‘Wanna go out with me so I have a shot at owning all the fancy stuff in this house?’Screenshot-11674Tia accepted his proposition, partly out of pity, but mainly out of greed.Screenshot-11675‘This legacy is giving me a headache,’ rudley interrupted Devon.  In truth, he was feeling bitter that Maple had selected Cory over him and the realisation that he would never become a valued part of the Bailey legacy had become too much to bear.Screenshot-11668Thankfully for him, this generation was now finished, which meant it was unlikely he would ever be mentioned again, unless Basil is selected as the final heir, but that is totally up to the public!  This time the heir voting poll will be posted up once the university chapters have been posted up.
I’m on holiday between 5th October – 16th October, so the university chapters shall commence on my return 🙂  Much love.

Chapter 4.7

Chapter 4.7 – But she is the biggest troll of them all

Soon again it was Christmas time, and everyone was just thrilled to wait around for pretty much every Bailey in existence to open up their presents.Screenshot-1261An almost teenage Murphy was very excited to receive a box filled with what appears to be a block of multi-coloured pixels.Screenshot-1260Hayley, on the other hand, actually could not give two shits about what was happening in the other room and decided to Frape Judd, who had forgotten to log out from Facebook on his laptop. Screenshot-1264The triplets had also grown since their last appearance and had naturally gained new interests and traits.  Malibu was now a crazy cat lover, apparently.Screenshot-1292Amaretto was pretty much a spitting image of Coco, but actually cared about the rest of family unlike her mother. Screenshot-1290And Jameson was growing up into a mini version of Judd, and was simply easily impressed by anyone or anything and often stood still and stared into space, much like in this picture.Screenshot-1291Anyways, it turned out that everyone had received Christmas presents, except for poor Tremayne because no one really knew what mechanical beings actually liked, besides scrap metal and oil.  He was contemplating shutting down his own system, until Coco made a very thrilling announcement.

Do not fret Tremayne, I got you the best present ever,’ Coco revealed, her grin as wide as an obese child’s waistline.  ‘Judd and I paid some tramps to build you a luxury mini-house right next to ours!’Screenshot-1282Tremayne’s eyes welled up with tears.  Well, they would have if he had not been a simbot.  Still, his programming convinced him that he was feeling overwhelmed with emotion.’Is it cozy’ Tremayne asked.Screenshot-1283‘Of course it’s cozy!  Go outside, you can see it from the back porch!’  Coco replied, waving a clacker thingy (perhaps not the technical term, but oh well) up in the air, like she just did not care.Screenshot-1281Feeling excitement, Tremayne rushed outside.  His robotic heart churning in anticipation as his eyes scanned across the garden, looking for the personal living area which had been built especially for him.  Then, he saw it…  Slowly, the buzzing in his circuits dissipated.Screenshot-1297And that was the moment when Ricky Bailey realised Coco was a bigger troll than he had ever been.  Boy was he a proud Great-Grandfather!

‘Trololololo!’Screenshot-1280

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