A Bailey Legacy

Tis rather delicious

Archive for the tag “Maple”

Chapter 9.4

Chapter 9.4 Worst Wedding Ever

The years went by quickly.  Soon Basil was celebrating some sort of landmark birthday.Screenshot-13920Knowing that there would be cake, Orion and Rolo turned up to celebrate.  Screenshot-13929Their family also tagged along.  Here is a snapshot of Orion’s son, Kraig.  Yes, Orion and Melanie were too cool to name him ‘Craig’.  Screenshot-13952Rolo also had a son, who quite honestly looked a bit gawky.  His name was Irwin though, so what did you expect?Screenshot-13931Chilli enjoyed missing with him, having a sense of humour and all.   Screenshot-13932Oh yes, Chilli had grown up into a cute kid.  No doubt he had inherited the best genetics from his parents.  Would he turn into a good looking teenager?  Only time would tell.Screenshot-13873He also loved baking muffins.Screenshot-13844And he was into painting random things with neon paint.Screenshot-13864They were not the most masculine of activities, but Chilli enjoyed them so that was all that mattered.     Screenshot-13862Despite he thought he son was rather awesome, Basil secretly enjoyed spending time with Bongo more than hanging out with Chilli.Screenshot-13867His career as a thief meant that the police often sniffed around his house, so having a big dog meant that they kept their distance from the house, scared they would get their faces gnawed off.  Screenshot-13870‘Hey, isn’t it about time we got married?’ Tia asked one night, realising that this was Chapter 9.4.

‘I suppose it is,’ Basil agreed, happy to jump at any opportunity where he could dress up like a dapper old penguin.Screenshot-13883And so, a few weeks later, Tia donned her wedding gown – which Basil had stolen from Kate Middleton- and looked forward to finally becoming a Bailey.Screenshot-14005Outside, Rolo thought it would be hilarious to throw a water balloon at Basil’s freshly ironed wedding suit.  Screenshot-14013For a moment, it looked like Basil wanted to punch Rolo in the face, but then he started to laugh hysterically.  Naturally this freaked Rolo out a bit since he was certain he had crossed the line with his butch little brother.Screenshot-14015‘Oh you, always the prankster,’ Basil chuckled.  Rolo started to laugh along, cautiously at first.    Screenshot-14014‘Haha, yeah, that’s me,’ Rolo chortled along, ‘Say, how about we…’

‘Haha… Get out of my house,’ Basil said bluntly. Screenshot-14016Meanwhile, by the buffet table, Maple stood around bored out of her mind.  For once she was not in the limelight, and she had no husband or man in general to make out with to pass the time.Screenshot-14031She pondered what she could do to liven things up and become the center of attention. Screenshot-14032‘I suppose there’s one thing,’ Maple muttered out loud.   Screenshot-14033Screenshot-14035    Screenshot-14038‘Yep, this will work nicely.’Screenshot-14051‘Really?!  It wasn’t even your time,’ The Grim Reaper said. ‘How did you even… You know what, I don’t actually care.’  Screenshot-14062Tia desperately tried to win back the attention of their wedding guests so she could, you know, actually get married to Basil, however, her attempt was in vain sadly.Screenshot-14068‘So, Maple, any last words or requests?’ Old Grimmy asked.      Screenshot-14071‘Well, now that you mention it…’Screenshot-14067THREE HOURS LATER

‘Ok, I’m bored now.’Screenshot-14075 Screenshot-14074  Screenshot-14076And so, Maple was whisked away into her resting place, and the wedding was pretty much over before it had even started.Screenshot-14077‘Only your Grandmother would go to the extremes of dying at a wedding to become the star attraction,’ Tia sighed to Chilli once the commotion had died down.Screenshot-14089‘Indeed. Well done for ruining the day, Maple,’ the Graduation Gnome said, giving her selfish actions a solid thumbs up.     Screenshot-14092‘I’m sure your wedding would have just been generic and boring,’ Chilli replied as he munched on his chilli con carne.  Screenshot-14088Tia made a mental note to poison his pack lunch on Monday.Screenshot-14086

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Chapter 9.3

Chapter 9.3 It’s a bit Chilli

Sometime in December, Tia and Basil became parents to a typically tanned Bailey baby.Screenshot-13514The story behind his birth was one rather amusing tale.  Tia had been repairing the bathtub, which Tremayne had broken in a fit of rage after one of his favourite X-Factor contestants had been voted off during the semi-final.Screenshot-13477Ten minutes into tightening up the taps, Tia felt a sharp twinge in her stomach, which caused her to spring to her feet.Screenshot-13488At first she thought she had picked up food poisoning from the leftover pancakes she had licked off a plate that morning, but after a few more minutes, it became apparent this was a very different sort of pain and she started to cry for help.Screenshot-13483Fortunately, Basil heard the commotion from downstairs and rushed up to see what the problem was.

‘Oh my Rod!’ He exclaimed.Screenshot-13493‘Look at all this mess!  I knew we should have got an actual mechanic to come in and…’Screenshot-13491‘Say another word and you die.’Screenshot-13489Chilli was born a delightful twenty-six hours later.  They actually did not intend to name him that. Tia had planned to call him Ash, but unfortunately Basil thought the nurse was asking him what the weather was like outside when she was filling out the birth certificate.Screenshot-13512Still, Chilli was a delightful baby, and Basil was a very smitten father.Screenshot-13574Screenshot-13576Unfortunately, Maple, who had started to develop arthritis and goodness knows what else, was not very good when it came to holding Chilli.Screenshot-13593No matter what she did, she could not quite grasp the concept of holding him correctly. Screenshot-13592‘Oh bother!’ She would sigh whenever she dropped him.  With her still about, it was a miracle he lived beyond the age of two.Screenshot-13594Since it was Christmas time and all, the Baileys decided to throw a party.  Almond and Pistachio even turned up with food, which meant no would have to bother cooking for the next several days.Screenshot-13549It also turned out that Rolo and Niki were expecting their own bundle of joy.  For some reason they had not bothered telling the rest of the family, despite they only lived next door, which also showed how often they saw them.   Screenshot-13554Speaking of rarely seeing people (or robots), Tremayne’s love interest for the past few hundred decades, Dawn, also made an appearance to this party.Screenshot-13558He was desperate to talk to her.Screenshot-13556Sadly, even with Orion’s support, he lacked the confidence to approach her, especially when he heard she was dating yet another elderly rich man, thus he remained sad and lonely for the foreseeable future.  Screenshot-13557In time, Chilli grew up to be a cute toddler, a luxury that still currently went unknown in the Sims 4.Screenshot-13682Tia was a fantastic mother, and even had the genius idea of potty training Chilli outdoors, where the smell would not cause anyone to throw up slightly in their mouths.Screenshot-13685Screenshot-13687Basil also doted on his baby boy, who was practically his clone.Screenshot-13631‘Goodnight Son.  Daddy’s got to go out to work and con people.’Screenshot-13632He still also found the time to dote on Bongo, who had grown up from this…Screenshot-13211…into an awesome big dog.    Screenshot-13675‘If you break into our house, I will eat you.’ Bongo warned.Screenshot-13677

   

Chapter 9.2

Chapter 9.2 – Hen Shower

Tia found out she was pregnant a couple of months after her engagement to Basil.Screenshot-13304She was excited to birth the final baby in the legacy and to marry Basil once the weather was nicer.Screenshot-13319Sadly, things were not all sunshine, lollipops and babies in the Bailey household.   Quite recently Maple had discovered Cory’s extensive collection of alien porn on the household laptop.Screenshot-13297‘I’ve tried getting help,’ Cory explained solemnly, ‘but my addiction is too strong to break!’Screenshot-13298‘It’s always excuses with you,’ Maple hissed, eyebrows furrowing beyond their natural ability.  ‘Sometimes I think I’d be better off without you!’Screenshot-13299Minutes later, Maple’s wish was granted.Screenshot-13323Screenshot-13326‘Yo, you’re dead.’Screenshot-13350‘Woooooo!’ Cory cheered.Screenshot-13347‘Ok, that wasn’t the reaction I was expecting…’Screenshot-13349‘This is sure to make Maple feel guilty for the rest of her days,’ Cory explained, his eyes gleaming with glee.   Screenshot-13346‘You’re not allowed to be happy that you’ve died,’ The Grim Reaper moaned.  ‘Can you at least pretend you don’t want to cross over yet?  I get a bonus for each person who pleads for their life you see, and times have been tough recently…’Screenshot-13341With reluctance, and partly out of the kindness of his still heart, Cory dropped to his knees.  He hoped he would be granted an awesome house in the afterlife for doing this.Screenshot-13353‘Oh please spare me, your Lordship!  I have so much to live for, so much more I want to see, so many more aliens I want to…’Screenshot-13355‘Err, come to think of it, I didn’t actually want to die… Pleeeease don’t….’Screenshot-13357‘Bored now!’ The Grim Reaper announced, before painfully sending Cory off to the afterlife with a swipe of his scythe.Screenshot-13361‘I’m going to feel so guilty for the rest of my days,’ Maple sobbed, whilst Tremayne daydreamed about finding somebody to love.Screenshot-13332And so, the graveyard collection grew once more.Screenshot-13363A few months later, when everyone had forgotten about Cory, Maple organised a baby shower for Tia.Screenshot-13386She invited a small handful of guests, including Almond, Niki, and Christie – the girl who broke Orion’s heart many moons ago. Screenshot-13403Tia was happy she could finally use her mixology skills to make some yummy beverages.Screenshot-13395Non-alcoholic of course, what with being pregnant and all.Screenshot-13401‘Erm, who the hell is he?’ Tia asked when she noticed a stern looking man with pigtails shuffle over to the pizza.    Screenshot-13406‘My name is Brenda,’ the man simply said, which perhaps suggested that he, or she, was going through some kind of gender identification crisis.   Screenshot-13409Still, things started well as they all sat around the table, chatting about the latest developments in their lives.  When the doorbell rang, Tia wondered, as she sat up, when they were going to shower her with presents for the baby.Screenshot-13411When Tia answered the front door, the truth came tumbling in, along with Nicole, Pistachio’s wife.

‘Let’s get ready to paaaartaaaay!’ Screenshot-13422As it turned out, the baby shower was just a cover up so Maple could pull off a surprise hen do for Tia, despite she would not be marrying Basil anytime soon.

‘He’s a mighty fine stripper, isn’t he?’ Nicole announced.  She sunk down into a squat position and stated to pant like dog.Screenshot-13418‘I’d like to get my paws on him!’Screenshot-13420‘I’d better grab the mop and bucket,’ Tia cringed as a puddle started to form on the floor where Nicole was standing.  Screenshot-13407Despite how messed up the situation was, everyone had a great time.Screenshot-13435Except for Tia, of course.  Screenshot-13432Maple even tried her luck with one of the strippers, once he was back in his clothes. Screenshot-13450‘Ever slept with a grandmother before?’Screenshot-13446Screenshot-13451 Maple could not understand why her pick-up did not work.Screenshot-13453Consequently, she drowned her sorrows by drinking one too many margaritas and passed out just before midnight.  Screenshot-13467‘I’m making a sandwich!’ Basil stated since he had not appeared at all in this chapter, and wanted to remind everyone that he was the heir of this generation.Screenshot-13149

Chapter 9.1

Chapter 9.1 – Suck it up

Basil and Tia settled quickly into the next generation.  This had nothing to do with the fact their creator wanted to get the legacy completed as soon as possible.Screenshot-13146Orion had moved out after proposing to Melanie and ensured they ended up in a house on the far side of town so that they could escape from the insanity of the Baileys.Screenshot-12728Shortly after, Rolo and Niki got engaged and had moved out, only to just move into the massive house next door, where Hershey, Twix’s brother, had once lived.Screenshot-13174Oh, and speaking of Twix, he had died soon after Rolo had gone off to University.  The Grim Reaper had offered him lots of cake and science related things in exchange for his physical body and organs.  Naturally it was an offer he couldn’t pass up.Screenshot-11718On the bright side, soon after graduating for Uni, Basil decided to adopt a cute little puppy whom they named Bongo since the Baileys were quite keen on the tropical drink called Um Bongo, which had the most catchiest advert in all of existence.Screenshot-13277Unlike the previous dog owners in this legacy, Basil actually interacted with Bongo on a regular basis.  This kept them both amused for hours, much to Tia’s relief.Screenshot-13216Maple was still alive and kicking.  Bored of being a famous director, she attempted to forge a singing career.Screenshot-13159Sadly, her singing was as bad as her rapping, and Cory made his opinion on this matter very clear.Screenshot-13163‘You suck!’Screenshot-13161As for Tremayne, the ever neglected running joke of the legacy, he tried to prove himself useful by becoming Tia’s personal trainer.  It did make sense since she was eager to become an astronaut, just like he had been for the last few hundred years.  Screenshot-13165‘This weight is too heavy!’ Tia screamed as her muscles started to break and snap under the strain of the iron. It was clear that Tremayne still did not understand that humans were unable to lift as much as a robot.Screenshot-13166‘Suck it up, Princess!’ Tremayne replied, before upping the kilograms once more.   Screenshot-13167Once Tia had recovered from her horrific injuries, Basil decided to take her out for a lovely romantic meal, partly in the hope he would get some woohoo later on, but mainly to help with speeding the final generation on slightly.Screenshot-13217And so, after their delicious noms, they danced randomly on the rooftop terrace to some fancy 1950s music.Screenshot-13230When Basil suddenly dropped to one knee, Tia was concerned thinking he had sprained his leg whilst they had been doing ‘the twist’.Screenshot-13234Basil then whipped it out.  Then, he tugged a jewelry box out from his pocket  and flicked it open.Screenshot-13253‘Let’s get married and make a beautiful child.  Perhaps not quite in that order since winter is coming and we don’t want to copy my mum by having a winter wedding!’Screenshot-13256‘Yey!’ Was all Tia could say, overwhelmed at the prospect of marrying into an ultra rich family.  Not that she was a gold digger or anything…Screenshot-13255Thus, Basil fixed the ring onto Tia’s finger so she could never remove it, or leave him against his will.Screenshot-13260‘So shiny!’Screenshot-13268And, like with all the other previous proposals over the last several generations, the couple fell into a warm and loving embrace, relishing the last few moments where they would not want to kill each other.Screenshot-13270Screenshot-13272

Chapter 8.8

Chapter 8.8 Nice day for a white wedding

Maple and Cory decided to throw a winter wedding in their backyard, just to be different.  Being insanely rich, they were able to afford ice sculpted chairs and a cute DJ called Tom.Screenshot-11572To Maple’s annoyance, the paparazzi also made an appearance since she was a Z list celebrity in the media world.  Fortunately, she had a way to deal with such inconveniences.

‘Hmm, that’s funny,’ Maple spoke out loud, ‘I don’t remembering hiring a chubby and persistently annoying photographer for the wedding.’Screenshot-11564‘Bitch’Screenshot-11560Soon, the official photographer turned up, just in the nick of time for the happy couple to exchange vows and what not.Screenshot-11598As it turned out, Maple was not very photogenic.Screenshot-11595Yet Cory was.Screenshot-11599For this reason, Maple favoured the long distant shots, and the ones where she was not gawping like a demented pitbull.Screenshot-11600During the ceremony, Pistachio was, perhaps, a little bit too emotional.Screenshot-11593No one, apart from his wife (Nicole), found it endearing.Screenshot-11615‘Now we’re married, I guess this means you’re gonna start nagging me more often now,’ Cory joked.

Maple stared him down into a deathly silence.Screenshot-11580He then quickly kissed her before she could ask for a divorce.Screenshot-11606Screenshot-11614‘Cake time!’ Maple enthused, and quite rightly so.Screenshot-11621-editScreenshot-11622-editMaple was quite happily about to dig into her scrumptious slice of wedding cake, until Devon Hoff made his way over to her table, balancing his own equally slice of awesomeness on his old arthritic hand.Screenshot-11629-editMaple did her best to ignore him as he stood there, but he soon enough spoke up.Screenshot-11628-edit‘Room for one more?’ He asked, eyes hopeful.Screenshot-11626-editScreenshot-11627-edit‘Give it time, she’ll come running back to me,’ Devon confidently said, five minutes later, sat at a completely different table.Screenshot-11631-edit‘Sorry, old man,’ Almond asked, her mouth filled with delicious moist cake, ‘did you say something?’Screenshot-11630-editMeanwhile, since the DJ had decided to up and leave before the party was even over, the ever musically talented Rolo had taken over.Screenshot-11633-edit‘I’m making musics!’Screenshot-11635-editNow, it was a common misconception that aliens unitentionally invented dub-step when they first attempted to make contact with humans.  Naturally this was not the case, and as soon discovered, this type of “music” played at exceedingly high volumes was very damaging to an alien’s eardrums, and thus resulted in Orion passing out and almost freezing to death in the snow.Screenshot-11642-editFortunately, Tremayne had come outside to show off his new lover: the hairdryer.Screenshot-11643-edit‘Suppose I’d better do the just thing…’ Tremayne sighed, and proceeded to thaw Orion with Brenda the hairdryer.Screenshot-11644-editMinutes later, Orion had been defrosted.  Tremayne cheered for joy, well, until Orion snatched the hairdryer out from his hand, tossed it into the pool and swore at Tremayne for burning his perfect alien complexion, before marching off.Screenshot-11647-edit‘Why do I even bother?’ Tremayne sighed, then decided to head on inside for a piping hot shower.Screenshot-11648-editThat night, several guests decided to stay over, and by stay over, I mean they basically decided to stand on the front porch and wet themselves because they had temporarily lost the ability to navigate themselves down a straight path and leave the property through an open gate. Pistachio was one of these people, which was why he was a bit stinky the following morning.

After breakfast, he approached Rolo, who was about to practice his mad skills on the DJ booth.Screenshot-11650‘Soon the time will come for Maple to pass the legacy down to someone, and personally, I think you’re best suited,’ Pistachio confessed.  In all honesty, he did not entirely feel this way and just fancied witnessing a bit of drama between his nephews.

‘Couldn’t agree with you anymore, Unc,’ Rolo replied, finally glad that someone had recognised his great potential.  ‘Basil may be a smart guy, but he does have a tendency to steal things at times; not particularly a positive role model for the next generation, right?’Screenshot-11649They continued to bitch about Basil until Rolo eventually noticed that his younger brother had in fact been standing right by them for the entirety of their private conversation, which made things a little bit awkward.Screenshot-11651Naturally, this gave Basil the incentive to prove he could be a just a worthy heir as Rolo could be.  He already had some pretty good traits, minus his kleptomania, so all he needed was a baby vessel, and he had just the girl in mind.  Tia Aquino was a generic pretty young lady who was in a few of his classes at school.Screenshot-11652‘Wanna go out with me so I have a shot at owning all the fancy stuff in this house?’Screenshot-11674Tia accepted his proposition, partly out of pity, but mainly out of greed.Screenshot-11675‘This legacy is giving me a headache,’ rudley interrupted Devon.  In truth, he was feeling bitter that Maple had selected Cory over him and the realisation that he would never become a valued part of the Bailey legacy had become too much to bear.Screenshot-11668Thankfully for him, this generation was now finished, which meant it was unlikely he would ever be mentioned again, unless Basil is selected as the final heir, but that is totally up to the public!  This time the heir voting poll will be posted up once the university chapters have been posted up.
I’m on holiday between 5th October – 16th October, so the university chapters shall commence on my return 🙂  Much love.

Chapter 8.7

Chapter 8.7  Damn Technology

A few months later, after fixing the main household computer, Basil had a birthday.Screenshot-11468Even his estranged father made an appearance, mainly for the cake side of things.Screenshot-11474‘See, I told you he’d turned up once we paid him!’ Maple laughed.Screenshot-11490Young Basil grew up into a not too bad looking teenager, meaning that he fortunately had inherited more of his father’s genetics than his mother’s.Screenshot-11496‘Why am I being blamed for the downfall of the Bailey genetics?’ Whitney complained, to no one in particular.  ‘If anything, you should be thankful that my genes eliminated the Mika Moore moose nose.’Screenshot-11437However, as it turned out, her input was no longer valid in this legacy.

‘Oh come on!’Screenshot-11439‘Erm, so, hey there, Death, fancy sparing my life like you did with my husband?’Screenshot-11452The Grim Reaper loudly cleared his throat, eyes gesturing down to the floor. Screenshot-11453Whitney quickly got the hint.Screenshot-11451‘Oh please spare my soul, wonderful great one!’ Screenshot-11449‘Hmm, let me think.’Screenshot-11450Screenshot-11454Once the deed was done, old Grimmy made a beeline for the Bailey library.Screenshot-11459‘Now, time for some Game of Thrones.  I wonder if Ned Stark will heroically save the day?’Screenshot-11462Meanwhile, outside, Maple and Cory were too busy making out to realise Whitney had died.  Funnily enough, since they were getting old, they were scared of dying alone, which is the reason why they had decided to give things another go.Screenshot-11518‘I love you, Mape,’ Corry said, his voice sending warm flutters down Maple’s spine.Screenshot-11524‘Let me show you how much,’ he added.Screenshot-11525Maple was speechless when he whipped it out.Screenshot-11529‘Will you marry me, partly so I can get rid of my ridiculous surname?’Screenshot-11530For what seemed like several minutes, Maple stared at the sparkly retina-burning ring in awe.  She honestly never thought she would marry anyone during her generation.   Screenshot-11531‘Oh, go on then!’ Maple finally confirmed, after deciding to play things cool, rather than start crying and beg for him to wed her then and there.Screenshot-11534And so, they were engaged and happy.Screenshot-11540Although deep down inside, Cory would never forgive for having another man’s child and would always resent Basil’s existence somewhat.Screenshot-11507The children were not too happy when they heard about their engagement.  Basil was particularly annoyed because he would have preferred for Maple to marry his biological father, despite the old man was on his last legs.Screenshot-11515As for Orion, he coped by taking a hell of a lot of space heroin and almost overdosed.Screenshot-11542All in all, it was a standard week in the Bailey household.

 

Chapter 8.6

Chapter 8.6 Love? Actually, not

Soon enough, Rolo entered his teenage years and resembled his Great-Uncle Aero somewhat, although it was probably just the hair colour that did it.Screenshot-11394This naturally meant he had to become a brooding guitar boy.Screenshot-11373His crush, Niki Minaj Nutella Natalis had also done a bit of growing up.Screenshot-11337After witnessing his Mother’s failure to bag a man of her own when she was his age, Rolo decided to quickly make the moves on Niki before another sim did.Screenshot-11341Screenshot-11343Screenshot-11345Perhaps he got a bit too carried away…
‘Mmmph!’ Screenshot-11344Orion was pleased for his half-brother, honestly, he was.Screenshot-11367His best friend and crush, Christie Rooney had thrown away their friendship by frolicking off into the arms of bad boy, Jimmy Harlow, whom teased Orion relentlessly for being an alien.Christie and Jimmy - Sims 3 Bailey LegacyTo cope with this trauma, Orion became addicted to an alien invented drug called heroin.Screenshot-11371As for Basil, the baby of the family, he had recently aged into a child, a slightly plump one, although that may have just been down to Whitney’s ghastly “fat face” genetics, which had unfortunately been passed down onto Maple, and now onto both her children.Screenshot-11374At least it was better than inheriting the Mika Moore nose, ‘ey, Twix?Screenshot-11325‘It’s ok Twix, as long as I live we will share the same shaped nose!’ Hershey exclaimed, rushing into the Bailey legacy house like he still lived there (which he didn’t).Screenshot-11313‘Err, what’s this?’Screenshot-11315Hershey begun ascending towards the ceiling.Screenshot-11316‘Oh, snap.’Screenshot-11317‘Well, it looks like I’m dead, so scrap what I said about our noses.’ Screenshot-11319Screenshot-11327Indeed this was a very emotional and heart-breaking moment for Twix, having always been close to his baby brother  (flashback photo!).Screenshot-8416‘Erm, shouldn’t have the Grim Reaper shown up by now?’Screenshot-11328‘Ugh!’ Screenshot-11329‘God damn scythe!  I knew I should of just used the front door, like a normal bloody person.’Screenshot-11330Death aside, Rolo and Orion had the most important night of their teenhood’s to attend; that’s right, Prom night!  Here is how dapper they looked.Screenshot-11401Screenshot-11402It appeared that at some point during this night, Rolo stumbled across Orion’s “special stash”.Rolo is high at promAnd somehow, without the use of his “special stash”, Orion ended up getting close to a stunner called Melanie Hester, who, despite having physical similarities to Niki, was not related to her.Screenshot-11429Orion was quick to work his moves on her. Screenshot-11427Unlike Rolo, Orion knew not to overdo the first kiss, thus making him a better boyfriend.Screenshot-11426Unfortunately, Basil took an instant disliking to Melanie after she called him Levi.Screenshot-11418‘Sorry, but you can’t blame me for assuming you were named something ridiculous?  Christ, your Grandfather’s named after a frickin’ chocolate bar.’Screenshot-11419Levi Basil did not take kindly to her response.Screenshot-11420It took two months for Melanie to recover from her injuries after her unfortunate accident with the ice-cream van later that day.

 

Chapter 8.4

Chapter 8.4 Green Affairs

Life with the fridge people did not turn out as anticipated, so Whitney returned to reality and decided to focus on her own flesh and blood.Screenshot-10942This meant disposing of the things which did not fit this criteria.Screenshot-10988Screenshot-10991Fortunately, Tremayne booted up in time before he and Orion were recycled.  After that the two little misfits were inseparable.Screenshot-10951‘Enough of those misfits!  It’s Christmas, let’s partaaaay!’ Maple announced, ruining  the sentimental opening  to this chapter, and terrifying the poor blond guy standing in front of her.Screenshot-10912‘One of those misfits is my son,’ Sunnup said.  She had been invited to the party by Cory as he thought it would be a good idea for Orion to know that Maple was definitely not his mother, and also because Cory hoped he could participate in a bit of alien intercourse.Screenshot-10911Anyways, Maple had also invited a certain someone along to her party; Devon Hoff, the older brother of a guy she had dated during high school, and also one of her fellow work colleagues.Screenshot-10914This guy if you have to know (Morris Hoff).  Sadly he was married with children.Screenshot-10909Devon was not, thus making him a suitable man.
‘So, err, do you like stuff?’Screenshot-10936‘Devon, Maple is depressed with her current life and wants to bang you in attempt to feel better about herself,’ Almond translated.Screenshot-10937‘Erm, I’m not sure if I want that,’ Devon replied.Screenshot-10935‘It’s you or your brother, and in her current state she would definitely sink that low.’Screenshot-10939So, the following night, Maple ended up setting foot into Devon’s flat.Screenshot-10996‘You promise you won’t break up my brother’s family, right?’ Devon asked, body trembling in fear.Screenshot-11001‘As long as you promise to love me and take me away from my prison of a life!’ Maple chirped.Screenshot-10997‘Of course.’Screenshot-10998Spolier: He did not.Screenshot-11000A few months later, Cory was still being a doting father, despite circumstances had changed once more.Screenshot-11034Screenshot-11035Yes indeed, another little bundle of joy was on the way.Screenshot-11046Cory would have been thrilled, if it had not been for the fact he had not made woohoo with Maple for well over a year.Screenshot-11036Because of this, he had a small suspicion that this baby was not his.Screenshot-11038‘Ya think?’ Fudge sighed, before he continued to munch on the rotten food placed before him.Screenshot-11114Classy as ever.

Chapter 8.3

Chapter 8.3 Out of this world

As what happens often during a pregnancy, Maple went into labour.Screenshot-10835And off she waddled down the front path.Screenshot-10845‘Why are we letting her reproduce?’ Alice cried out, watching hopelessly as Maple drifted towards the edge of the road, where a car would materialise out of nowhere and take her directly to the hospital.Screenshot-10842Cory then let out a squeal, and not because he had heard rumours that the Spice Girls were getting back together.  His stomach and groin areas were glowing bright green!Screenshot-10847‘Okaaay,’ Maple said, ‘we’re just going to ignore that…’Screenshot-10848Soon enough, Maple strolled out of the hospital with a baby.  She named him Rolo since she did not intend to give him away.Screenshot-10856Maple tried to kid herself that life would not change, that sleep would not become a rare entity she would fight Cory to the death for.Screenshot-10859She knew it was a fight she would win.  It was no secret that Cory was getting pudgy: one too many waffles, or so everyone thought.Screenshot-10865He had also been out on a couple of dates during Maple’s pregnancy, although he could not fathom as to why his trousers had become tighter than usual since he often opted for a healthy autumn salad.Screenshot-10826One afternoon, after lunch, Cory felt peculiar.  At first, he assumed it was a bit of trapped wind, but after letting out a few, he felt no better, and Maple was not impressed.Screenshot-10885‘Yeah, something’s not quite right,’ Cory said.  It felt like his insides were being twisted inside out, and then were being draped around someone’s neck, like a feather boa.

Screenshot-10888‘I’m not cleaning up after you if you can’t make it to the bathroom in time,’ Maple stated.Screenshot-10887As it turned out, Cory was experiencing the joys of labour, and swiftly gave birth to a little green bundle of joy, wrapped up in a blue blanket.  Unfortunately the pictures of his birth were too explicit to be shown, but if you can imagine a whole load of icing exploding out from a piping bag, you are heading down the right tracks.Screenshot-10893Cory quickly pieced everything together.  The alien who had abducted him had made her intentions clear from the very beginning, although somehow he had forgotten about this small detail.Screenshot-10782‘Do you wanna have sex?’

Cory hesitated for a moment.  Sex with an alien; it could be risky, and he could easily catch some kind of incurable space disease and die, or worse.

‘Yeah, ok.’Screenshot-10783‘You player, you,’ he baby gurgled in a language that Cory could not understand… Alien.Screenshot-10892Then, he winked.Screenshot-10895After a few minutes of thinking, Cory decided to name his son Orion.  For some reason, Whitney found baby Orion more interesting than her Grandson, Rolo; it was a shame he would not be illegible to carry on the Bailey legacy name.Screenshot-10904‘Some could say he’s out of this world!‘ Whitney laughed after nattering to Fudge non-stop about how awesome Orion was.Screenshot-10799Screenshot-10801‘If this coffee wasn’t lukewarm and likely to do any damage, I would throw it in your face,’ Fudge replied.Screenshot-10802Screenshot-10803Whitney decided to try and seek  a new life of solace with the fridge people; perhaps they would laugh at her jokes?Screenshot-10798

 

 

 

 

Chapter 8.2

Chapter 8.2 Be careful what you wish for

Eventually, Pistachio decided to propose to Nicole.Screenshot-10664She rejected his offering.Screenshot-10665Pistachio struggled to hold back his despair, that was until Nicole stated what he had done wrong.Screenshot-10666‘I’m the man of this relationship; I’ll propose and you can wear the ring!’ Nicole firmly stated.Screenshot-10667And so, Pistachio gushed like a girl when Nicole dropped on one knee and presented the very same ring he had offered her.  It did not fit very well on his finger, and he was rushed to hospital to have it removed several hours later, but it was worth it.Screenshot-10674Sometime later, they moved out into a house nearby where they would carry on with their lives and occasionally be invited to Maple’s future parties.Screenshot-10686‘Sounds like good to me!’ Pistachio said, ignoring the fact Nicole was trying to strangle herself in the background of their idyllic life.  Screenshot-10688Back at the Bailey household, Cory was beginning to regret moving in with Maple, even if the rent was cheap.Screenshot-10652Despite they were not dating, it was only a matter of time before alcohol and desire got the better of them.Screenshot-10746‘You’re on the pill, right?’ Cory asked, realising where all this was heading.
‘Of course,’ Maple lied.Screenshot-10748A few weeks later, Maple discovered she was pregnant.Screenshot-10763She decided to announce this to both Twix and Cory over dinner.Screenshot-10691For some reason, Twix was furious at Cory, despite Maple was the manipulative one.  Even when she confessed this, Twix still blamed Cory.Screenshot-10693By this point, Chewie the dog had experienced enough drama and decided it was time to die.Screenshot-10722‘Come here you!’Screenshot-10727‘See ya!’ The Grim Reaper shouted as he tossed Chewie up into the portal.Screenshot-10737Screenshot-10738‘Now, to take care of other matters.’Screenshot-10739Screenshot-10741The Grim Reaper had been watching Tremayne for quite some time and was envious at the fact this robot seemed to have an eternal life span.  Even Grim Reapers eventually died, in fact, this particular Grim Reaper was the third incarnation since the Bailey Legacy had begun.  He wanted to defy the laws of nature, and made it his mission to do so by the time the Baileys reached their tenth generation.Screenshot-10744‘One day, I will claim you.’ Screenshot-10743Some while later, Maple’s pregnancy begun to show.Screenshot-10788Cory found any excuse to stay away from her and her pregnant hormones.
One night, out in the front garden, he gazed up at a suspicious aura of lights in the sky and quietly wished he could be struck by lightening, or even better, be abducted by aliens.Screenshot-10777 Screenshot-10778‘N-no, no!’ Screenshot-10779‘I was jooooookiiiiing!’Screenshot-10780Little did he know the consequences that would follow.Screenshot-10781

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