Chapter 3.5

Chapter 3.5 – Can cook, but won’t, so sod off

Irish was a loving mother to her twin girls, Coco and Hayley, although she dressed them in similar style clothing and styled their hair the same all the time.  Fortunately, they were not identical else no one could have ever told them apart, although this is hard to tell in the picture below.  Oh well.Caramel was given a motorbike for his twenty-first birthday.  Unfortunately, it took him a while to grasp the basic concept of parking. Still, he had a grand day celebrating his birthday, mostly with Stacey since everyone else was either at work or school, or were too young to actually care.Cakey noms!They even did a bit of karaoke in their PJs, because that’s just how they roll.Oh, and somehow, Caramel got stuck underneath his dresser table.  It was not the most comfortable, nor productive hour of his life. Before long, the twins were children.Very hard-working children, obviously.Coco, who was the outdoor sporty one of the two, enrolled into scouts, although she never understood why the scout leader – a burns victim and only survivor of a house fire years ago that killed his mother and father – was scared of her.  Hayley on the other hand was into dancing and performing, much to Irish’s disappointment.  She had hoped Hayley would have been into cooking, seeing as Coco had shown no interest.Over the months, Irish encouraged Hayley to bake muffins and cookies.  Turned out she was actually a better business woman than Irish had been at her age.  Still, Hayley did not like baking  or cooking one bit.

One afternoon, Hayley was sat with Cookie, sampling the key lime pie their mother had baked before she had gone off to do some shopping.

‘Hey, sis?  You gonna become a contestant on Master Chef?  Or Lord Alan Sugar’s next Young Apprentice?’ Cookie asked.

‘Neither,’ Hayley swiftly replied, digging her spork into her piece of key limey goodness, ‘I wanna be a rock star.’

‘Oh?  Won’t Mum be disappointed?’

‘Oh no, she’ll understand soon enough once I get my point across,’ Hayley said, a little too innocently.Cookie wondered how Hayley would end up getting her point across.  He assumed she would just outright admit to Irish that she hated cooking.  However, Hayley’s method was far more extreme than anyone could have imagined. ‘God dammit, Hayley!’ 

Chapter 2.5

Chapter 2.5 – Burning Desires

As always, time flew by and it was soon time for Irish to become a fully fledged child.  The turnout for her party was not exactly something to boast about.  Then again, she was barely going to have many friends considering her age.She turned out a little cross-eyed unfortunately, but this was shortly fixed by Tremayne and an invention he had created.    Sadly, it left her mentally scarred for life.Nothing else particularly significant happened until Minty aged up into a teenager.Being a party animal, her turnout was muchos better than Irish’s party.Minty thought hard about her wish before blowing out the candles on her vanilla and raspberry birthday cake.  She decided that she wanted to become talented at something. Once she was settled on her wish, she took a deep breath and puffed out her candles in one attempt.  Fudge was not happy because he had in fact bought those candles that relight after they are blown out, so he promptly marched down to the grocery store for a refund.Minty’s wish was soon granted.  She became a talented musician, particularly when it came to playing the piano.  Fudge often watched, mostly in disapproval because he would have preferred that she had taken up chess so he had someone to play with.Because of her ambitious nature and arguably good looks, the boys at high school were quite fond of Minty.  She was literally fighting them off everyday.She was a force not to be reckoned with.Irish, who was still quite the daddy’s girl, had joined the Scouts so he would be even more proud of her than he already was. For one of her badges, and a chance to work for Lord Alan Sugar, Irish had to set up a successful business.  Since Irish was pretty good at cooking, she decided to work on establishing a bakery business.  She made some vanilla and blueberry muffins based on a recipe she had seen in a Delia Smith cookbook and tried to flog them off at the nearby park.To her disappointment, she did not even sell one measly muffin.  Well, she was charging them at $25 a piece, so what did she expect really?

Needless to say, Lord Alan Sugar was not impressed with her business acumen.Completely distraught that she would not become the next junior apprentice for Lord Alan Sugar, Irish returned home that night and confided in her doll, Crissy, who, over the years, had become more and more real to her.

‘Hush, hush, it’s ok, Irish,’ Crissy soothed, all ya gotta do is burn the Scout leader’s house down.  Burn it down, to the ground.’And so, Irish did.