A Bailey Legacy

Tis rather delicious

Archive for the tag “Fudge”

Chapter 9.6

Chapter 9.6 – The Bloody End

Tremayne decided to open up this chapter, since he had not been mentioned in the previous one.

tremaynefixingTo be fair, he was pretty much a household slave who had been forced to repair electronics over the past several generations. And also bathe their pets, since no one else bothered.

tremaynewashingBecause of this, Tremayne found himself shorting out regularly, just to avoid having any further involvement with this legacy.

shortingoutAs for Chilli, he was still as frustrated about his sexuality than ever.

gayloveHe buried himself into his hobbies to repress his feelings.


chillisculptingBasil and Tia tried to encourage their son to come out the closet on several occasions. They even attempted to lure the gay out of him by blasting out Madonna and Lady Gaga songs on the karaoke machine. Sadly, this did not work.

singasongBasil blamed Cari. She was as needy as ever, and growing more suspicious that Chilli was not all that into her. She even confided in Maple one New Year’s Eve, who quite frankly found the whole situation hilarious.

carimoaning‘At least I didn’t pin my hopes and dreams on a sausage jockey,’ Maple blissfully thought as she reflected on her bad life choices.

maplenotgivingafuckRealising Maple had stopped listening to her almost an hour ago, Cari decided to go and take matters into her own hands. Eventually, she found Chilli in the dining room chatting to Tia and two other Baileys.


partytalk‘Oh, fuck me sideways,’ Tia sighed when she saw Cari glaring at her. Chilli desperately tried to hide behind his mum as Cari came marching over to them.fuckyoucari‘Godammit, Cari! Take the hint!’ Basil said.
But Cari refused to listen and made Chilli dance with her and kiss her all night.   takethehintSoon, things got too much for Chilli. The poor guy just wanted to be with someone who understood him.raarHe always felt relaxed and at ease whenever he was with Sonny. After all, Sonny knew about his fetish for cutting bodies up.lovesonnyAlthough, after the time Sonny had encouraged him to murder and feast on a homeless sim the local park, Chilli started to suspect that Sonny may actually be a vampire. Or a cannibal.nomnomhumansDeciding to fuel his curiosity, he outright asked Sonny if he was a vampire.areyouavamp‘Haha, err, what made you think that?’ Sonny asked, his eyes glowing brighter than usual, and his fangs partly exposed.errwtf‘Ya kinda like flesh and blood,’ Chilli explained. ‘A lot.’fleshaddict‘Oh, no, I’m just a cannibal,’ Sonny replied. ‘Definitely not a vampire.’liesSatisfied with his explanation, Chilli suggested they should go scouting for more homeless people.
‘Fucking idiot,’ Sonny sighed under his breath.StupidboyThat day, they had their fill of homeless sims until Sonny got a stomach ache, and Chilli threw up.stomachache

puketimeSoon, it was time for Chilli to celebrate his eighteenth birthday. Being their only child, Basil and Tia splashed out for his party. The millions they owned was hardly going to be needed for any future generations after all.bigpartyThey even hired a DJ, who had a crush on Tremayne.DjloveAnd a magician, who accidentally on purpose fried Tremayne’s circuit board because she was jealous of this.jealousSurprisingly, no one dramatically died during this special celebration, although Cari did turn up, despite Chilli not inviting her.heycarigoawaySonny was there though, so Chilli did not really care about Cari’s existence in general. excitedchilli

Making a wish, probably involving bending Sonny over the buffet table, Chilli blew out his candles in almost one attempt.makeawishMoments later, he transformed into a very dishy young man.wellhellothereHe definitely had potential to become one of the top five attractive males in this legacy, but first he would have to sort out his hair and clothing, and his life in general.changethoseclothesSometime later, he managed to sort out the first two things.
‘Move aside, Fudge Bailey. A new type of awesome has been born.’sexychilli‘Puuuurlease, you’ve got nothing on me, boy.’fudgesass‘Wait, is this the end?’ Ricky asked. ‘Are we free to leave now?’yesrickyIndeed, the legacy had come to an end. Well, at least the main chapters. What a ride it’s been! ¬†I’m going to wrap things up with two more bonus chapters from Chilli’s POV. These will basically be his university chapters, although he’s not going off to university. After that, I’ll do an epilogue type chapter.

I’m off travelling for a few months from today, so all these bonus chapters will be posted up on my return (probably in about 3-4 months time). Please subscribe if you haven’t already, and stay tuned for those ūüôā


Chapter 9.5

Chapter 9.5 Don’t fear the Repo Man

‘So, who thought this legacy had been abandoned like a puppy on boxing day?’ One of the graduation gnomes asked at the latest gnome committee meeting.gnomemeeting
But now things were back on track. Chilli has grown up to be a good looking teenager with a slightly lopsided face. Probably the side-effects of the poison Tia had been feeding him over the years.
Fortunately, surgery rectified that issue.fixed
Chilli often spent time in the hobby room with a chainsaw. Chillichainsaw
For ‘sculpting’ obviously. Nothing to do with the students that seemed to keep disappearing from his school.Totallynotmurderingthem
Somehow he had ended up with a girlfriend as well. Cari Ferris. Her face was a bit pudgy, but overall she was ok looking. closeup
Basil thought he could do a lot better though.
‘Not gonna lie, son, but she is a bit of a butterface.’
Fortunately, Chilli had no romantic interest in her whatsoever. Or any other girls in general. Cari just had a high tolerance to rohypnol. When she had awoken in his arms whilst he was carrying her upstairs to the hobby room, she had naturally assumed he was taking her up to his room for sexy fun time.
Ever since that day, she had become completely smitten with him.
touchchilli‘Promise you’ll never leave me,’ she would say as she clung onto him for dear life.
‘I’ll be with you until your dying breath,’ Chilli replied, chillingly.hegonnamurderyou
As for Basil and Tia, they were doing alright. They were still married and committed to one another.
‘We can look just as cute as our son and his girlfriend!’ Tia exclaimed as she attempted to replicate the above screenshot with her hubby.copycats
They were still annoyed at Maple for dying during their wedding, so were constantly thrusting their wedding photos at anyone who dared visit their household, such as the picture below.
One evening, Basil was chilling on the bed, waiting for Tia to join him for a bit adult action, when a sinister looking stranger strolled into the room.basilandrepo
‘Honey, when you said you wanted to spice up our marriage, this isn’t what I was expecting!’ Basil called to Tia, who was taking a poo in their en-suite.Poo
It turned out the guy was just the Repo Man and he proceeded to quite rightly take some of their belongings, since they had neglected to pay their bills, despite they could easily afford them. Naturally, he decided to be a dick and announced he would be taking their toilet.
‘If you must,’ Tia sighed, hopping off the porcelin throne.
‘Ugh, on retrospect, you can keep it…’
Bongo then made an entrance, curious as to what all the ruckus was about.
‘Imma steal your dog,’ the repoman, called, say, Ian, decided.
After Bongo had horrifically heroically torn out Ian’s throat, Chilli eagerly assisted with destroying the rest of the evidence.cleanup
A few weeks later, once they had evaded various police investigations, the Baileys threw a party. The reason for this party is long forgotten since it has been two or more years since these screenshots were taken. Maybe it was someone’s birthday, or maybe Ricky had finally come out of the closet. Who knows.
RickeeehTia was asked not to prepare the food, following their last party where she had served up “invisible cheese platters”. ¬†Orion and Kraig had not approved of this.
Fortunately, Fudge turned up and rectified the food situation that day. He had finally graduated to being super-awesome so it seemed.
Ricky also helped out.
‘I’m helping!’
rickyfeltleftout1Anyways, it turned out that this party was to actually celebrate Christmas. Cari, being a bit of a gold-digger, was excited to see what Chilli had bought her.
Opening the present
In hindsight, perhaps buying her a knife shaped vibrator was not the best of moves. wtfisthis
Still, Chilli was displeased when she dragged him off into the kitchen for a stern word. He pondered taking her upstairs to the hobby room, but decided against it when he realised she would probably just assume he wanted to have sex with her.nosexplease
Fortunately, Chilli’s best friend, Sonny Reeder, was at the party, so things were not too miserable. Sonny was his best friend at school, a dishy young chap with a lovely bone structure. His pale complexion and bright yellow eyes were what jumped out the most, as well as the strange tattoo on his neck. Some people thought he was a vampire, but that was a silly accusation since vampires did not exist.watchthisspace
I mean, in a world of aliens, ghosts and Maple, it seemed like a really stupid concept.toomuchgoingon
Orion accused Sonny of being a tri-hard, a comment which did not go down too well giving the Baileys liking for Stephanie Myers. twilight fans
As Basil stood by the window to try and calm down, he looked over at Chilli, then at Sonny, before turning his attention back to Chilli.sulking
Suddenly, everything clicked into place. Waitasec
This young chap was the true object of Chilli’s affections. Cari was just a cleverly disguised beard.prettyvamp
Secretly, Basil had always wanted a gay son, especially one with a vampire fetish, so he decided to fully support what was to come.
Basil drank heavily that night. He was too drunk to make it upstairs to bed, so he ended up camping in a sleeping bag on the kitchen floor, because, screw using the sofas in the living room. kitchenkip
He awoke with a start at around 7am.
‘Bongo, go get Tia!’ Basil screamed when he realised he was somehow infused with the fibres of the sleeping bag.
All in all, it was a pretty standard Bailey party.

Chapter 8.4

Chapter 8.4 Green Affairs

Life with the fridge people did not turn out as anticipated, so Whitney returned to reality and decided to focus on her own flesh and blood.Screenshot-10942This meant disposing of the things which did not fit this criteria.Screenshot-10988Screenshot-10991Fortunately, Tremayne booted up in time before he and Orion were recycled. ¬†After that the two little misfits were inseparable.Screenshot-10951‘Enough of those misfits! ¬†It’s Christmas, let’s partaaaay!’ Maple announced, ruining ¬†the sentimental opening¬†¬†to this chapter, and terrifying the poor blond guy standing in front of her.Screenshot-10912‘One of those misfits is my son,’ Sunnup said. ¬†She had been invited to the party by Cory as he thought it would be a good idea for Orion to know that Maple was definitely not his mother, and also because Cory hoped he could participate in a bit of alien intercourse.Screenshot-10911Anyways, Maple had also invited a certain someone along to her party; Devon Hoff,¬†the older brother of a guy she had dated during high school, and also one of her fellow work colleagues.Screenshot-10914This guy if you have to know (Morris Hoff). ¬†Sadly he was married with children.Screenshot-10909Devon was not, thus making him a suitable man.
‘So, err, do you like stuff?’Screenshot-10936‘Devon, Maple is depressed with her current life and wants to bang you in attempt to feel¬†better about herself,’ Almond¬†translated.Screenshot-10937‘Erm, I’m not sure if I want that,’ Devon replied.Screenshot-10935‘It’s you or your brother, and in her current state she would definitely sink that low.’Screenshot-10939So, the following night, Maple ended up setting foot into Devon’s flat.Screenshot-10996‘You promise you won’t break up my brother’s family, right?’ Devon asked, body trembling in fear.Screenshot-11001‘As long as you promise to love me and take me away from my prison of a life!’ Maple chirped.Screenshot-10997‘Of course.’Screenshot-10998Spolier: He did not.Screenshot-11000A few months¬†later, Cory was still being a doting father, despite circumstances had changed once more.Screenshot-11034Screenshot-11035Yes indeed, another little bundle of joy was on the way.Screenshot-11046Cory would have been thrilled, if it had not been for the fact he had not made woohoo with Maple for well over a year.Screenshot-11036Because of this, he had a¬†small suspicion that this baby was not his.Screenshot-11038‘Ya think?’ Fudge sighed, before he continued to munch on the rotten food placed before him.Screenshot-11114Classy as ever.

Chapter 8.3

Chapter 8.3 Out of this world

As what happens often during a pregnancy, Maple went into labour.Screenshot-10835And off she waddled down the front path.Screenshot-10845‘Why are we letting her reproduce?’ Alice cried out, watching hopelessly as Maple drifted towards the edge of the road, where a car would materialise¬†out of nowhere and take her directly to the hospital.Screenshot-10842Cory then let out a squeal, and not because he had heard rumours that the Spice Girls were getting back together. ¬†His stomach and groin areas¬†were glowing bright green!Screenshot-10847‘Okaaay,’ Maple said, ‘we’re just going to ignore that…’Screenshot-10848Soon enough, Maple strolled out of the hospital with a baby. ¬†She named him Rolo since she did not intend to give him away.Screenshot-10856Maple tried to kid herself that life would not change, that sleep would not become a rare entity she would fight Cory to the death for.Screenshot-10859She knew it was a fight she would win. ¬†It was no secret that Cory was getting pudgy: one too many waffles, or so everyone thought.Screenshot-10865He had also been out on a couple of dates during Maple’s pregnancy, although he could not fathom as to why his trousers had become tighter than usual since he often opted for a healthy autumn salad.Screenshot-10826One afternoon, after lunch, Cory felt peculiar. ¬†At first, he assumed it was a bit of trapped wind, but after letting out a few, he felt no better, and Maple was not impressed.Screenshot-10885‘Yeah, something’s not quite right,’ Cory said. ¬†It felt like his insides were being twisted inside out, and then were being draped¬†around someone’s neck, like a feather boa.

Screenshot-10888‘I’m not cleaning up after you if you can’t make it to the bathroom in time,’ Maple stated.Screenshot-10887As it turned out, Cory was experiencing the joys of labour, and swiftly gave birth to a little green bundle of joy, wrapped up in a blue blanket. ¬†Unfortunately the pictures of his birth were too explicit to be shown, but if you can imagine a whole load of icing exploding out from a piping bag, you are heading down the right tracks.Screenshot-10893Cory quickly pieced everything together. ¬†The alien who had abducted him had made her intentions clear from the very beginning, although somehow he had forgotten about this small¬†detail.Screenshot-10782‘Do you wanna have sex?’

Cory hesitated for a moment.  Sex with an alien; it could be risky, and he could easily catch some kind of incurable space disease and die, or worse.

‘Yeah, ok.’Screenshot-10783‘You player, you,’ he baby gurgled in a language that Cory could not understand… Alien.Screenshot-10892Then, he winked.Screenshot-10895After a few minutes of thinking, Cory decided to name his son Orion. ¬†For some reason,¬†Whitney found baby Orion more interesting than her Grandson, Rolo; it was a shame he would not be illegible to carry on the Bailey legacy name.Screenshot-10904‘Some could say he’s¬†out of this world!‘ Whitney laughed after nattering to¬†Fudge non-stop about how awesome Orion was.Screenshot-10799Screenshot-10801‘If this coffee wasn’t lukewarm and likely¬†to do any damage, I would throw it in¬†your face,’ Fudge replied.Screenshot-10802Screenshot-10803Whitney decided to try and seek ¬†a new life of solace with the fridge people; perhaps they would laugh at her jokes?Screenshot-10798





Chapter 7.5

Chapter 7.5  The cake and the bees

Sometime after the wedding, Whitney fell pregnant.Screenshot-8930This was mainly because Twix had not been taught the correct concept of the birds and the bees.Screenshot-8902Hershey, who was a little bit annoyed that Twix had beaten him to accomplishing something, quickly followed suit and got Allyson knocked up, since obviously he was unable to impregnate Whitney.Screenshot-8924Twix didn’t really want an additional individual family member to look after, but unfortunately kicking Tremayne out was not an option since he was still the breadwinner of the household. ¬†Therefore, Twix gave Hershey a handful of money so he could buy the mansion next door and live there with Allyson.Screenshot-8934In time, Whitney gave birth to Maple.¬†¬† ¬†¬†Screenshot-8947Both Twix and Whitney were so thrilled. ¬†They just couldn’t wait for all those sleepless nights and dirty nappies.Screenshot-8948Whitney dove straight into motherhood and appeared to be a natural.¬†¬†Screenshot-8955Screenshot-8956By natural, she just pretty much left Tremayne to do all the dirty work.Screenshot-8958Not that he minded. ¬†Clearly Cointreau and Jeffrey had forgotten to warn Twix about his mishaps with children during the last generation.Screenshot-8959Fortunately, Twix found out after reading through Cointreau’s secret journal and politely told Tremayne to stay the hell away from his children.¬† ¬†Screenshot-8991At first, Twix was not sure how to take care of Maple.¬† ¬†Screenshot-8982But after reading a few baby books, he became a pro. ¬†The easy thing to remember was that babies were not edible, even if they were named after pleasant things.Screenshot-8980And so,¬†Maple grew up to be a cute little toddler with a clear mixture of her parents genetics.Screenshot-9048Twix relished spending time with her, being a family man and all that jazz.Screenshot-9051Soon enough,¬†Whitney found out she was expecting another child. ¬†By this point Twix knew about the birds and the bees, so clearly he had been aware of the consequences this time around.Screenshot-8990A couple of months down the line, Twix celebrated some kind of birthday, somewhere between the age of 30 and 40.Screenshot-9011Surprisingly, all his siblings decided to show up, although this was only for the cake.¬†¬†¬†Screenshot-9016Allyson made an appearance too, purely because she knew she looked slim compared to pregnant Whitney so wanted as many photos as possible taken standing next to her.Screenshot-9027Shortly after the celebrations, Whitney went into labour.Screenshot-9058Yet another baby girl was born, whom was named Almond. ¬†Although they adored her, Twix and Whitney hoped that their next, and last, baby would be a boy seeing as it had been proven that they make easier heirs.¬†Screenshot-9066‘You know it!’ Fudge said, who has mastered the arts of awesomeness long ago and was now working on becoming ultra-awesome, a feat that not many had ever accomplished in life or death.Screenshot-8997

Chapter 6.9

Chapter 6.9 All good, butter face

Hershey decided to grow up to be an adorable looking toddler.Screenshot-6822He was so adorable that it was necessary to show another picture of him in the exact same pose, only closer up and from a slightly different angle so everyone was aware of just how adorable he was.Screenshot-6820Cointreau was pleased that at least one of her children had inherited pretty much all her features and spent most her time with Hershey.Screenshot-6884Well, anytime that did not involve changing his nappy or trying to settle him down to sleep at night. ¬†She left this task up to Tremayne.Screenshot-6818Twix, who was on the cusp of childhood, was aware that he was treated a little bit differently compared to his siblings.Screenshot-6816The family convinced him however that it was perfectly normal to spend all night sitting on the floor it you happened to have blonde hair.Screenshot-6817Also, they threw him a lovely birthday party, only to eat all the cake whilst he ran upstairs to change his hairstyle and clothes.Screenshot-6841Still, he transformed into a rather cute child. ¬†It also turned out that his hair was drity-blonde, not bleach blonde, so it did not look ridiculous against his dusky skin tone.Screenshot-6850Aero decided that Twix was alright and started to treat him with a bit more respect, instead of mixing dog food with his Weetabix every morning.Screenshot-6857A couple of years later, Bounty celebrated the anticipated step into teenhood.Screenshot-6867Sadly, she grew up with a bit of a horse face. ¬†Still, it was likely a man, or a horse, would still find her attractive enough to marry one day.Screenshot-6882Prom time quickly came around.Screenshot-6898Bounty scrubbed up well for a Butter Face.Screenshot-6891Aero decided to to don the same tuxedo his Great-great-great grandfather, Fudge, wore for prom. ¬†However, Earl ridiculed him for being a copy-cat.Screenshot-6893Naturally this dampened his spirits and he spent all night with the following frown on his face, which somehow only amplified the amount of female attention he received, much to the dismay of his girlfriend, Adrianne.Screenshot-6894The reason behind Earl’s negative attitude towards Aero was a lot more complex.¬†¬†Screenshot-6874He was still bitter about his failure of a love life, you see. ¬†Tiffany and him had broken up a few years back, and to this day he was alone and single with no children to boast about.Screenshot-6871‘Luckily he wasn’t chosen to become the heir of this generation,’ Alice, the founder of this whole legacy, laughed. ¬†She had not made an appearance in a while, so thought it was about time she closed off a chapter for us. ¬†Thanks, Alice.Screenshot-6671

Chapter 5.8

Chapter 5.8 – These kids have the smarts

Soon enough, young Earl grew up into a child.Screenshot-3955 - CopyHis birthday party was memorable, only for all the wrong reasons. ¬†The main one being that Hayley Bailey decided it was the perfect time to finally join her twin sister, Coco, in the afterlife.Screenshot-3927 - CopySoon after his transition into childhood,¬†Earl started to spend most his time with Saffron playing chess, what with them both being geniuses and all.Screenshot-3976 - CopySaffron, who was fast approaching her teenage years, also enjoyed messing around with her great-great grandfather Fudge’s old chemistry set, making strange potions.Screenshot-3910 - CopyOccasionally, the results of playing with severely dangerous chemicals were not good.Screenshot-3924 - CopyHer twin sister, Peach, was more into creating painting animals and food, mainly because she had not developed any real interesting traits over the years.Screenshot-3969 - CopyAs for the younger set of twins, they had grown up into cute looking toddlers, although Cointreau was still evil and had recently learnt how to twist nipples.Screenshot-4001For this reason,¬†Jameson much preferred holding Frangelico,¬†as per his joyful facial expression.¬†Screenshot-4003Although happy that most of his children were growing up to be fine little specimens, Jameson did not like the fact that he was getting slightly older each day and that the amount of wrinkles appearing on his face seemed to be slowly increasing every passing week.Screenshot-3904 - CopyMika, on the other hand, did not look a day over twenty, thanks to her apparent Asian genes. ¬†Screenshot-3999Still, Mika found Jameson attractive, and the poor children had to put up with the obvious fact that their parents were still very much sexually active, since they were still not married.Screenshot-3987Cointreau and Frangelico¬†soon started asking questions as to why Mummy and Daddy were not wedded (they caught onto things quickly thanks to the influence of their older siblings). ¬†Mika tried to explain things in the best way possible.

‘You see, sometimes mummies and daddies want to enjoy their lives before tying themselves down to the commitment of marriage.’¬†Screenshot-3984‘Then why have you had five children?’ Frangelico asked, looking up from her picture book, watching as a “that’s a good point” expression appeared across her mum’s face.¬†Screenshot-3983This chapter will end with Fudge eating a moldy plate of cheese, since he can make anything look awesome (and yes, that’s Judd in the background playing pool).Screenshot-3988

Chapter 5.2

Chapter 5.2 –¬†¬†Man, did he love cake

Despite his seemingly boisterous bravado, Jameson sometimes found it difficult to speak to people, more so than often when he was trying to secure gigs from proprietors who barely spoke a word of Simlish. ¬†Screenshot-3109He attempted to communicate using wild gestures, but this only confused matters further.Screenshot-3110Screenshot-3112Eventually the old lady clued on that he was after a gig, not a rampant night of crazy sex, and gave him a slot for the following day to perform outside the coffee-house.Screenshot-3206Screenshot-3204He pretty much nailed it. ¬†Even Hayley, who had only popped along to throw stuff at him, was mildly entertained.¬†¬†¬†Screenshot-3208Yes indeed, things were going well for Jameson and his budding career. ¬†He had no plans to ask Mika Moore to move in with him as of yet. ¬†Well, not until all his siblings had eventually moved out.Screenshot-3217Aaron had recently proposed to Malibu, so it was now only a matter of time before she moved out (sadly without Mew the cat due to her now living with Murphy and all).Screenshot-3194Still, she was confident she would have sexy babies with Aaron, so nothing else mattered really.Screenshot-3200A few months later, Malibu was all set to get married. ¬†She even had the dress and everything.Screenshot-3242Aaron was more enthused about the cake, however. ¬†Man, did he love cake.Screenshot-3238And dancing.Screenshot-3298The wedding took place in the usual location, and the same old screenshots photos were taken.Screenshot-3258Screenshot-3283Murphy was an emotional wreck, whereas Coco was proud that at least one of her children was not a complete¬†embarrassment.Screenshot-3260Cookie, Coco’s older brother, managed to make an appearance to the wedding. ¬† He used to be ginger once upon a time.¬†¬†Screenshot-3282Oh, and Margaret was also totally pregnant.¬†Screenshot-3295She went on to have a baby boy, who Murphy decided they would name Francisco because it was a rather awesome name.¬† Please see screenshot below for proof of this.Murphy's First ChildSpeaking of awesome, this chapter shall end on a picture of Fudge Bailey, standing by the water-slide his wife tragically died on.Screenshot-3239

Chapter 4.12

Chapter 4.12- Who to pick?

One delightful autumn morning, the Bailey teens were all sat around the breakfast table munching away on some delicious pancakes Murphy had¬†prepared.Screenshot-1810‘I can’t help but notice that Mum or Dad haven’t picked one of us to take over the Bailey legacy,’ Amaretto said, tapping her fingers against the palm of her hand, ‘and it isn’t long until Murphy turns eighteen.’Screenshot-1808‘They’ll make a decision soon enough,’ Jameson reassured,¬†concentrating¬†to balance his plate on his hand despite his body was shaking from¬†alcohol¬†withdrawal, ‘that or they’ll decide to get someone else to decide.’Screenshot-1809‘Obviously it’s a choice between Malibu and I,’ Amaretto responded, turning to her sister. ¬†‘Women just make better¬†inheritors.’Screenshot-1806‘I beg to differ,’ Murphy cut into the conversation. ¬†‘I hear that our Great-Grandfather Fudge was the most awesome man in¬†existence¬† ¬†Most Bailey men are in fact. ¬†Even Uncle Cookie has his own art gallery set up.’Screenshot-1812‘Whatever, I have a cat,’ Malibu said, after getting up from her chair with Mew tucked under her arm, as the other teenagers followed suit, ‘so if I don’t become heiress, I’ll just become an evil genius instead and live in that¬†volcano¬†lair on the island.’Screenshot-1815Now, since Jameson knew his Mum was the ultimate decision maker and that she did not really like him, he decided to try to warm her heart by taking an interest in his health and fitness. ¬†Turned out that Jameson was a natural¬†athlete, so¬†exercise¬†came easy to him. ¬†Screenshot-1785‘Don’t think that working out with me is going to get you any brownie points, kid. ¬†You’ll never make a worthy heir, and even if you were, I wouldn’t pick you,’ Coco announced, voice all high and mighty, despite she did not even have the “snob” trait.Screenshot-1786Bitch, please, it doesn’t matter who you pick to be heir. ¬†In ten years time you’ll be old and forgotten about. ¬†You’ll have saggy tits, so no one will want you, not even Dad.’¬†Screenshot-1787Coco pretended that Jameson’s comments did not get to her, however,¬†the following weekend¬†she decided to throw a costume party. ¬†This was partly because¬†it was Halloween, but mostly because she was now slightly paranoid about being portrayed as a boring old bag of wrinkles.Screenshot-1780Murphy decided to¬†recycle¬†the costume he used one¬†Halloween¬†as a child, only now it made him look somewhat smexy and not a Johnny Depp rip-off / potential lawsuit.Screenshot-1821Malibu decided to do something different and dressed up as a¬†scuba-diver, somehow managing to pull it off pretty well.Screenshot-1822Amaretto opted for a cowgirl outfit since it was usually a safe bet.Screenshot-1820And Jameson dressed up as a¬†hot-dog, as you do.Screenshot-1819The guests soon arrived, and instantly Jameson was drawn to a rather tanned looking individual called Nina.Screenshot-1828Jameson quickly decided that this girl would become his girlfriend.Screenshot-1830And so Jameson proceeded to woo her with funny cat videos. ¬†Yes, really. ¬†¬†Screenshot-1826Malibu and Amaretto were not particularly impressed by the male talent (such as the man below), so they kept their knickers firmly on that night. ¬†Screenshot-1824Murphy, who ditched his costume because Mew the cat threw up all over him after eating a piece of chocolate, was pleasantly surprised when he went to answer the door to one particular trick-or-treater.¬†Screenshot-1833She was a couple of years younger than him¬†and had wide innocent Bambi eyes which literally just gave Murphy the instant horn. ¬†Screenshot-1836Screenshot-1835Well now, a pretty girl like you deserves a treat,’ Murphy smoothly said, dropping a few packets of Haribo into her basket (oi oi).Screenshot-1837He then promptly invited her to attend his 18th birthday party, which was to be held in a few months time at the venue the Bailey family were renowned for booking their parties.Screenshot-1839Sadly, Murphy’s crush turned out to be a bit of an evil bitch and completely ignored him on the day of his party and ended up getting off with a random fat bloke.Screenshot-1863Murphy ended up spending most the night with an annoying guy who had not even been invited to the party.Screenshot-1850The main thing was that Jameson enjoyed himself, so naturally nothing else mattered.Screenshot-1852Well, that’s the end of Generation 4! ¬†For the first time in this legacy, the choice of the next generation heir/heiress is completely yours. ¬†There will be a few bonus chapters of all the candidates going to University during the next week or two, and the poll to vote for who you want to front Generation 5 will be posted up somewhere during this time, so stay tuned.

We end this generation on a picture of Mew the cat, because she is rather awesome and there was not enough screenshots of her in this chapter.Screenshot-1769

Chapter 4.10

Chapter 4.10 – Oh, so animals don’t bend that way

Still looking to become a better parent,¬†Coco decided it was about time to learn how to cook . ¬†Screenshot-1568After all, the children were not exactly getting a¬†nutritious and¬†well-balanced diet with the crap she usually fed them.Screenshot-1569Screenshot-1551Unfortunately, Coco’s cooking did not go down too well.Screenshot-1487As for Murphy, he was growing up fast and was about to embark on his prom night. ¬†Unfortunately the dapper little dude had no date (goodness knows why!), but still, he planned to have a jolly good time like his Great-Granddad Fudge had (please refer to Chapter 1.5.)Screenshot-1547‘Have a great time, Murphy! ¬†Remember, if you don’t end up ¬†kissing anyone don’t worry, I’m more than triple your age and ¬†haven’t even had my first kiss yet, but look how happy and emotionally stable I am!’Screenshot-1549Screenshot-1550A few days later,¬†Malibu found a lovely stray cat when the family went on an outing to the spring festival.Screenshot-1506Scooping the warm bundle of fluff up into her hand, she showed him off to the rest of the family, including Tremayne. ¬†He screeched in excitement and asked if he could hold her.Screenshot-1507Sadly, Malibu learnt the hard way that¬†Tremayne was not programmed to handle animals.Screenshot-1504What was worse was that the cat was actually not a stray… nor was he very much alive after breaking his neck and spine rather severely. ¬†Screenshot-1505After this little incident, Tremayne paid Amaretto a lot of money for her to build him a module for his innards which would allow him to play and¬†nurture¬†animals without brutally killing them. ¬†Screenshot-1562With his secret money stash from his military job, Tremayne purchased a sweet little pet ratty. ¬†He figured it was best to test the waters with a smaller critter before going for a puppy or something. ¬†Screenshot-1542Screenshot-1541‘You’re my best friend, Lenny,’ Tremayne said, gazing down at his rat’s beady little eyes. ¬†‘Nothing is ever going to tear us apart.’ ¬†Screenshot-1553‘Ever.’Sad Lenny

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