Chapter 8.3
Chapter 8.3 Out of this world
As what happens often during a pregnancy, Maple went into labour.
And off she waddled down the front path.
‘Why are we letting her reproduce?’ Alice cried out, watching hopelessly as Maple drifted towards the edge of the road, where a car would materialise out of nowhere and take her directly to the hospital.
Cory then let out a squeal, and not because he had heard rumours that the Spice Girls were getting back together. His stomach and groin areas were glowing bright green!
‘Okaaay,’ Maple said, ‘we’re just going to ignore that…’
Soon enough, Maple strolled out of the hospital with a baby. She named him Rolo since she did not intend to give him away.
Maple tried to kid herself that life would not change, that sleep would not become a rare entity she would fight Cory to the death for.
She knew it was a fight she would win. It was no secret that Cory was getting pudgy: one too many waffles, or so everyone thought.
He had also been out on a couple of dates during Maple’s pregnancy, although he could not fathom as to why his trousers had become tighter than usual since he often opted for a healthy autumn salad.
One afternoon, after lunch, Cory felt peculiar. At first, he assumed it was a bit of trapped wind, but after letting out a few, he felt no better, and Maple was not impressed.
‘Yeah, something’s not quite right,’ Cory said. It felt like his insides were being twisted inside out, and then were being draped around someone’s neck, like a feather boa.
‘I’m not cleaning up after you if you can’t make it to the bathroom in time,’ Maple stated.
As it turned out, Cory was experiencing the joys of labour, and swiftly gave birth to a little green bundle of joy, wrapped up in a blue blanket. Unfortunately the pictures of his birth were too explicit to be shown, but if you can imagine a whole load of icing exploding out from a piping bag, you are heading down the right tracks.
Cory quickly pieced everything together. The alien who had abducted him had made her intentions clear from the very beginning, although somehow he had forgotten about this small detail.
‘Do you wanna have sex?’
Cory hesitated for a moment. Sex with an alien; it could be risky, and he could easily catch some kind of incurable space disease and die, or worse.
‘Yeah, ok.’
‘You player, you,’ he baby gurgled in a language that Cory could not understand… Alien.
Then, he winked.
After a few minutes of thinking, Cory decided to name his son Orion. For some reason, Whitney found baby Orion more interesting than her Grandson, Rolo; it was a shame he would not be illegible to carry on the Bailey legacy name.
‘Some could say he’s out of this world!‘ Whitney laughed after nattering to Fudge non-stop about how awesome Orion was.
‘If this coffee wasn’t lukewarm and likely to do any damage, I would throw it in your face,’ Fudge replied.
Whitney decided to try and seek a new life of solace with the fridge people; perhaps they would laugh at her jokes?
