Chapter 3.1 – Make mine a double
Thankfully, Crissy did not murder Irish in her sleep. She got distracted by a nice young blonde man and claimed him as her own.When she finally remembered, Crissy couldn’t believe that she had planned to kill Irish in her sleep. Still, feeling a little bit bitter about Irish once wanting her dead, she decided to sneak into Irish’s room one night when she was sleeping and, somehow, surgically attached a plate of fish of chip to her hand.
Needless to say, Irish was not impressed when she woke up the next morning.After having an extremely painful operation to remove the plate, Irish enjoyed a pleasant dinner of fish and chips, and a few weeks later she proposed to her boyfriend, Stacey, despite he clearly did not know how to dress or manage his hair.‘Yeah, I like, don’t really want to sleep alone when I have a pyromaniac ex-imaginary doll thing that wants me dead, so please move in and marry me!’‘Sure,’ Stacey said, ‘sounds legit to me.’Irish swiftly gave him a makeover to make him more presentable to other human beings.Being a bit of a loner, Stacey spent most of his time writing sci-fi stories. He also liked painting, just so you know.Shortly after Irish’s and Stacey’s engagement, Pippy had an unfortunate accident on the “slip ‘n’ slide” in the back garden after she and Fudge had been drinking rather heavily.Sadly, it resulted in her death.The Grim Reaper made an appearance. He had hoped to join in with the drunken poolside mayhem, but was annoyed to find that he had to send a body off to the spirit world instead.
‘Curse thee!’Needless to say, Fudge was devastated at the loss of his lovely wife.Like, really devastated Tremayne would have genuinely felt heartbroken for Fudge, if it was not for the fact he was a robot, so therefore lacked real emotions or a heart. The very next evening, Fudge decided to do something which he had always vowed to do if Pippy ever died before he did. No, not suicide… he actually went to visit the science research facility, and
held the researchers at gun-point until asked the researchers to kindly clone him.And thus, Caramel Bailey was produced, a child clone of Fudge. ‘Oh ma gawd!’ Fudge exclaimed, peering down at his younger self. ‘Pint-size awesomeoness!’There was no doubt that Caramel was Fudge’s clone – not a random child that the researchers had snatched from the streets. Caramel enjoyed being awesome, and also enjoyed sitting in the same armchair as Fudge.(Yes, the one below is an old pic where Fudge still had his beloved waistcoat… RIP poor waistcoat)